Oh, joy!

Last Sat, I went to Alliance Francaise to borrow France travel guides. I left the library pretty pleased with myself, armed with 6 travel guides. But really, that wasn't what made me dance around with joy. You know, that crazy toe-wriggling happy-joy feeling.

After years of prowling supermarket aisles and food purveyors shelves in KL, I finally found them. Vanilla beans and varlhona chocolate! The very two ingredients that would magically transform my baking endeavours into heavenly delights.

At Alliance Francaise, there's a french cafe called Gourmandines that not only serves french cuisine but stocks french foodstuff. Yes, there's where I found the wonderful vanilla beans and valrhona chocolate. They even have illy coffee! I couldn't stop grinning from ear-to-ear when I saw the vanilla beans and varlhona chocolate on the shelf.

Ah, what a great way to end a horribly stressful week. A good supply of France travel guides, vanilla beans and valrhona chocolate. Three things that gave me unadulterated joy during the weekend!

It ain't easy being single

Once again, I had to defend my single and boyfriendless status.

This time, I'm reminded that 'age is catching up' and that 'I'm happier being with a man and even better if I'm married to him.'

WHAT THE FARK?

Yesterday, I met up with an old galpal, Lin who's a stay-at-home with 2 kids. We've been friends since college days and once in a while, I buzz her to meet up. And meeting up means taking a 20-min drive to her place. Because she has 2 young children, we have tea at her place.

Over the years, I find myself drifting further and further from married friends, especially those with kids. I realised that they don't share my enthusiasm with happenings in my single life, especially holiday plans.

I love my holidays. I need them. Life is so much interesting when I travel. I come back with stories, images and memories.

However, yesterday was a strange epiphany. I suspect that Lin secretly resents me for living the freely single life while she stays at home taking care of her kids. Or that it's her passive-aggresive reaction to my wonderfully single life. Still, I don't want to make assumptions.

Next, she lamented on how I'll never be happy and stay stagnant if I don't let go of Mr. J. Yeah, I can't let go of him, because I'm dealing with a personal issue. And because of my unwillingness to let go of Mr. J, I'll never have another man in my life and that was when the whole 'age is catching up' and 'I'll be happier married' came in. All her unsolicited advice was psychologically eroding. I left her place, feeling utterly vacuous with a vague sense of sadness. No wonder my instincts kicked yesterday. I heard a little voice urging me to not meet up with her, but I chose to overlook it.

I always believe when something good happens; it's a blessing. When it's bad; it's experience. There's a good reason for things to happen and if you look hard enough, there's a valid life lesson.

For years, I've kept a Happiness card by my workdesk which I, incidentally, bought during a low peak in my life. This morning, I looked at it and realised that what Lin said yesterday 'was a reflection of herself and not me.'

No one can decide what's good for me and what truly makes me happy. Only I can decide what's good for me.

Baking away the blues

I got up at the wrong side of the bed this morning.

Grouchiness tailed me the whole day. Constant hungry pangs hit me all day. Finally at around 3pm, I had enough of having a bad day syndrome.

So, what did I do? Yeah, you guess it right.

BAKE.

When I'm highly stressed, I go bake and feel much better afterward. It's an instant mood elevator.

Plus I've been wanting to try this cherry cake recipe for the past month. Instead, I converted the recipe into cherry cupcakes. They were delightfully soft and fluffy with luscious gems of sweet cherries.

The first time

After weeks of badgering from Mr. Busybody Glenn, I finally called Mr. J to wish him 'gong hei fatt choy' on the first day of the CNY. He sounded happy and we chatted for an hour.

On Sunday, he called me out to dinner but I had Chap Goh Mei dinner at my mum's place. Out of the blue, I asked if he'd like to join me and my family for dinner.

That was totally uncharacteristic of me, as my mum has this unwritten rule of bringing men home. I remember her telling me when I was 15, that the men my sister and I were to bring home are the ones we're going to marry.

And true enough, her one and only matriarch rule prevailed for years. I've never brought any boyfriends home. My mum doesn't know who the men in my life are. And my sister only brought one man home, that is my brother-in-law.

When Mr. J walked into my parent's house, my Aunty Lily told me, my eyes lit up and I practically glowed. He was charmingly polite to my parents and relatives. My cousins (little ones and adults alike) all eyed him curiously. My aunts couldn't stop gushing on what a 'leng chai' he is. My uncles couldn't stop talking shop with him. And my parents, oh well, they were somewhat baffled.

Later in the kitchen while doing the dishes.

Is he your boyfriend, ah? whispered Aunty Lily.

No la. He's just a friend. Why ah? I bring home a guy doesn't mean he's my boyfriend. We're living in the 21st century, ok? I hissed back.

Wait, you just wait... I can see you marrying this one.

* leng chai- handsome fella

Travel dilemma

I've taken the plunge to do the courageous thing. After deliberating (and procrastinating) for years, I've decided to go to France.

Right now, I'm having a little anxiety moment. Should I book my plane ticket first or book hotel reservations? It's a little tricky as summer is a peak season for Paris and I don't know which to book first- plane tic or hotel rerservation?

In the past, my solo travels were always to a country where I've got a friend living there. So accommodation is automatically taken care of. All I need to do is book my plane tic and apply for visa.

This Paris trip is going to be my first real solo trip as I'll be completely alone in a foreign land where I know no one. A little scary but I want to do this as I've been meaning to do this for a long time.

I need feedback, advice and travel tips. But most importantly , please help me to answer my dilemma here - should I book the plane ticket or room reservation first?

I was a teenaged domestic goddess

Like Sari Party Girl, I'm recipe-mad.

It all started when I was 13 and had just started Secondary 1. One evening, after school, I spied a whimsical recipe in The Star - Coca-Cola Cake.

'How interesting! You mean, I can bake a cake with Coca-cola? Wow!'

Excitedly, I quickly cut out the recipe and pasted it in a brown soft cover exercise book with the "Sekolah Kebangsaan Menengah" school emblem.

And that was the beginning of a lifelong habit of cutting and pasting recipes from magazines, newspapers and even food labels. Recipes that got me licking my lips. Recipes that made me wonder what they'd taste like. Recipes that have unusual ingredients. Recipes that have the wierdest ingredient combination.

Unfortunately, I lost my first recipe scrapbook to a classmate who carelessly misplaced it. For years, I mourned the lost recipe of the Coca-Cola Cake until ten years ago to my delight, I found my first treasured cut-and-paste recipe in the internet. Ah! The joys of the internet!

Here's a recipe of the Coca-Cola Cake. It's actually a lovely caramely chocolate cake.

Coca Cola Cake & Icing
1 cup butter
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 cup Coca Cola
2 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups white sugar
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 cup buttermilk (or combine 1/2 milk + 1 tsp lemon juice. Let stand for 5 min and beat well)
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups miniature marshmallows

Coca Cola Cake Icing
6 tablespoons Coca Cola®
3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 cup butter 4 cups confectioners' sugar
1 cup chopped walnuts
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Cake
1. Heat to boiling: butter, cocoa and Coca Cola.
2.Remove from heat and add flour, sugar, baking soda and mix gently.
3. Stir in buttermilk, eggs, vanilla and marshmallows.
4. Pour into greased 13 x 9-inch pan. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 30 to 35 minutes.
Cake can be frosted while warm. Makes about 12 -14 servings.

Icing
1.Bring to boil butter, cocoa, and Coca Cola.
2. Remove from heat and stir in confectioners' sugar, chopped nuts, and vanilla.
3.Top cake while hot.

Annoying twitch

Whoever you are, will you please stop thinking about me?

Since yesterday, my left eyebrow has been twitching involuntarily all day. One minute ago, it just twitched. And last night, in my sleep, I even felt my eyebrow twitched.

It's annoying as I'd wonder who could it be after an eyebrow twitch.

Eat, drink and celebrate

* Gong Hei Fatt Choy *

This year, I have extra luck with my two of my angpows. Aunty Lily and my hard-core gambler cousin have generously added lottery tickets to their angpow givings. My mood instantly reversed when I saw the two lottery tickets as I was in a grouchy, non-festive mood the whole week.

Last year, one of my aunts announced loudly that I'm the oldest among my cousins to be getting angpow- 'So when will that end ah? Better get married fast fast'. Really, that annoying reminder dampened my mood. I wasn't looking forward to hearing words of 'encouragement' to get married soon, when receiving angpows from the older generation and married cousins.

But I had fun this year. I played blackjack with my 11 year old cousins with 20 sen bettings. It was cheap thrill being the card dealer with three 11 year old boys. When they lose, they looked so disheartened and gave long sighs of 'aiyah' And when they win, they'd whoop and clap and cheer. Yeah, all for 20 sen winnings.

And I discovered that drinking beer is the best way to combat heatiness from overindulging in prawn crackers, dried meat and pineapple tarts.