Speedating to a life revelation
Last year, when I started blogging in November, I had a life-defining moment. Yep, an epiphany of sorts.
It started with my friend Allie who came back from Spore and called me to inform that she was taking me to dinner to meet a potential bf/husband/mate to introduce to me.
"Woman, I promise, promise, promise this'll be the last time I'm setting you up." With a big sigh, I told her - okay. After all, what have I got to lose? I'll be treated to a free dinner at some nice swanky restaurant. At least, the food'd be good.
On the date night, Allie came to my house at 5.30pm, armed with hair rollers, tongs, make-up, some dresses and even shoes. Woah! I told her- Oi, I agreed to a blind date, not a makeover-lah.. She assured me she wanted me to look my best. Crazy woman went on to do my hair into big wavy, loose curls which surprisingly turned out well. Also, she helped me to choose my outfit. However, I only wear what I want to wear and after much protesting, I settled on my own strapless velvet black dress and strappy heels. I sure wasn't going to wear any of her low-back dresses. My rule for dressing- I have to be comfortable and look elegant at the same time.
So, Allie came along with me and gave me the map to get to the place. It was located at the back of the Indian temple near the PuduRaya Bus Station. Good lord! PuduRaya!! I thought. And I'd secretly hope it was a surprise birthday party for me.
During the journey to the dubious building behind Pudu Raya Bus Station, I asked Allie to update me a little on my blind date. She was completely clueless -"Aiya, you'll meet him later" And I started praying for a night that ends well.
We headed to this place called 1919. When I drove up the road, I saw an old colonial-style white house. Immediately I fell in love with it. For a moment, I was glad I came. So, we entered the building which was a restaurant. Apparently, they hold jazz and piano performances at 1919.
There were about 20 men and women, all dressed to their nines and they were registering at this table at the doorway. I looked at Allie and hissed, " You stupid biatch! This is a speedating event!! Allie, I'm so going to get you for this." With much reluctance, I registered my name and was given a sticker to pin on my dress.
I won't fill you on how the whole speedating thing went. But I ticked yes for all 15 men. Yeah, I couldn't be bothered- fat, ugly, goodlooking, cleancut handsome, slobby-looking, corporate type, creative type. They were all the same to me that night. And during the 3 minute introduction, all I talked about was how gorgeous the building was and how I wanted to go upstairs to see if they had wooden floors and what the bathroom tiles were like.
Ah, well, my response was pretty good, I had 8 men who indicated interest in me. So far, I went out with 5 of them. But nothing happened beyond those first dates.
Perhaps, I'd always known that I couldn't make the man of my life appear with much planning and consideration. It's all up to fate and to God.
Allie came home for Christmas and asked me how it all went. I replied," You know, Allie, I'm NEVER ever going to get married. Maybe, I'm NEVER ever going to have a man in my life." At that moment, something went bling inside me.
Yeah, that took off a whole lot of weight and expectations that I've been subconciously carrying for years. The expectation of meeting the right man, get married and be a blissfully happy married woman. I had a clarifying moment where I realised that life is so much more than finding the right man and getting married.
I'm going to do a great many things in my life.
It started with my friend Allie who came back from Spore and called me to inform that she was taking me to dinner to meet a potential bf/husband/mate to introduce to me.
"Woman, I promise, promise, promise this'll be the last time I'm setting you up." With a big sigh, I told her - okay. After all, what have I got to lose? I'll be treated to a free dinner at some nice swanky restaurant. At least, the food'd be good.
On the date night, Allie came to my house at 5.30pm, armed with hair rollers, tongs, make-up, some dresses and even shoes. Woah! I told her- Oi, I agreed to a blind date, not a makeover-lah.. She assured me she wanted me to look my best. Crazy woman went on to do my hair into big wavy, loose curls which surprisingly turned out well. Also, she helped me to choose my outfit. However, I only wear what I want to wear and after much protesting, I settled on my own strapless velvet black dress and strappy heels. I sure wasn't going to wear any of her low-back dresses. My rule for dressing- I have to be comfortable and look elegant at the same time.
So, Allie came along with me and gave me the map to get to the place. It was located at the back of the Indian temple near the PuduRaya Bus Station. Good lord! PuduRaya!! I thought. And I'd secretly hope it was a surprise birthday party for me.
During the journey to the dubious building behind Pudu Raya Bus Station, I asked Allie to update me a little on my blind date. She was completely clueless -"Aiya, you'll meet him later" And I started praying for a night that ends well.
We headed to this place called 1919. When I drove up the road, I saw an old colonial-style white house. Immediately I fell in love with it. For a moment, I was glad I came. So, we entered the building which was a restaurant. Apparently, they hold jazz and piano performances at 1919.
There were about 20 men and women, all dressed to their nines and they were registering at this table at the doorway. I looked at Allie and hissed, " You stupid biatch! This is a speedating event!! Allie, I'm so going to get you for this." With much reluctance, I registered my name and was given a sticker to pin on my dress.
I won't fill you on how the whole speedating thing went. But I ticked yes for all 15 men. Yeah, I couldn't be bothered- fat, ugly, goodlooking, cleancut handsome, slobby-looking, corporate type, creative type. They were all the same to me that night. And during the 3 minute introduction, all I talked about was how gorgeous the building was and how I wanted to go upstairs to see if they had wooden floors and what the bathroom tiles were like.
Ah, well, my response was pretty good, I had 8 men who indicated interest in me. So far, I went out with 5 of them. But nothing happened beyond those first dates.
Perhaps, I'd always known that I couldn't make the man of my life appear with much planning and consideration. It's all up to fate and to God.
Allie came home for Christmas and asked me how it all went. I replied," You know, Allie, I'm NEVER ever going to get married. Maybe, I'm NEVER ever going to have a man in my life." At that moment, something went bling inside me.
Yeah, that took off a whole lot of weight and expectations that I've been subconciously carrying for years. The expectation of meeting the right man, get married and be a blissfully happy married woman. I had a clarifying moment where I realised that life is so much more than finding the right man and getting married.
I'm going to do a great many things in my life.
posted by Cupcake Queen at 6:36 PM
3 Comments:
If I had a friend like May, she'd be dead by now.
And yeah, I agree. It's never good to have expectations. I'll always have hope, but never expectations. (ok, it depends)
Yeah, I so wanted to kill her but she got really upset when I told her the "never gonna married part." I'm lucky to a friend like her who has my best interest at heart, albeit annoying at times.
I've been reading every post of yours ever since I discovered the link to your blog on LMD's blog! Good work. Refreshing honest, and I can sooo identify with your stories about Mr J. I had a big crush on a guy whom I was v gd email friends with once but never dared to show interest in, as I didn't think he'd like me. I still think of him even after I'm married but I guess he's what you'd call a dungu (no idea what that means, but I'm guessing an "idiot"?)...he never used to return my sms'es (which I sent him b4 eeting my then bf now husband).
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